Before competitions, formulate answers to:
• Why do I want my child to participate?
• What role do I want them to play?
• What goals do you have for the experience?
Compare these answers to your child’s answers.
The experience is for your child. Keep things in perspective and avoid having the sport serve as the only means by which the child has an identity.
RELEASE your child to the coaches and the sport experience. You are not releasing if:
• you continue to share in the credit if things go well
• you continually evaluate and assess performance
• you try to resolve all the problems that come up in a season (playing time, injuries, penalties, etc.)
• you continue to coach them when they probably know as much or more than you!
• you yell at officials during the game
• your child is over-‐stressed and over-‐managed
• you are building excuses at the end of the games (losses don’t need to be excused)
• your child avoids you or is embarrassed at the end of the game
• your child looks to you for coaching during the game
• you’re regularly and obviously nervous, or holding on to losses
After the competition:
• use praise and encouragement – no analysis or criticism
• your child needs a parent after the game, not a coach or critic
• give your child time and space – recovery time is important
• value of the youngster should not be tied to the outcome of the competition
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